Feedback is one of the most powerful tools you have as a manager—but let’s be honest, it’s also one of the trickiest. Done well, it builds people up, sharpens their skills, and strengthens your team culture. Done poorly? It can crush morale, damage relationships, and make people dread seeing your name pop up on their calendar. The art is in how you deliver it.

The SBI Framework

When in doubt, go structured. The SBI (Situation–Behavior–Impact) framework keeps your feedback clear and grounded in facts, not feelings.

• Situation → When and where did it happen?
• Behavior → What exactly did you observe?
• Impact → How did it affect the team, project, or outcome?

Example:
"In yesterday’s client meeting (Situation), when you interrupted the client three times during their presentation (Behavior), I noticed they seemed frustrated and rushed through the rest of their points, which meant we missed important details about their needs (Impact)."

Notice what’s missing? Judgmental language. That’s the beauty of SBI—it strips out the blame and focuses on observable actions.

Timing Matters

Feedback is like bread—it goes stale fast. But you also don’t want to serve it while it’s half-baked. The sweet spot is giving feedback soon after the event, but when both of you are in the right mindset to talk.

Good timing looks like:

• Within 24–48 hours of the event
• When you’re both calm and focused
• In a private space where they can absorb it
• With enough time to have a real conversation

Bad timing looks like:

• Dropping feedback in front of peers
• Catching someone mid-stress or mid-deadline
• Firing it off in a Slack DM for a complex issue
• Pouncing right after a heated moment

Make It About Growth

Here’s the mindset shift: feedback isn’t about proving someone wrong—it’s about helping them get better. The best feedback zeroes in on behaviors (things that can change), not personality traits (things that feel permanent).

Growth-focused language swaps:

• “I’ve noticed…” instead of “You always…”
• “What if we tried…” instead of “You should…”
• “How might we…” instead of “You need to…”
• “I’m curious about…” instead of “Why did you…”

These small phrasing tweaks keep the conversation constructive instead of defensive.

Listen and Collaborate

Feedback shouldn’t be a one-way street. After you’ve shared your perspective, pause. Ask questions. Invite them into the problem-solving process.

Good prompts:

• “What’s your perspective on this?”
• “What challenges were you facing?”
• “What kind of support would make this easier next time?”
• “How can we work on this together?”

Collaboration makes feedback feel like coaching, not criticism.

The Feedback Sandwich is Broken

You’ve probably heard of the “positive-negative-positive” sandwich. Here’s the problem: everyone sees it coming, and it makes genuine praise feel like a setup for the real hit. Instead, keep your structure simple and honest.

Try this flow instead:

1. State your intention (“I want to help you grow in this area”)
2. Share your observations (SBI)
3. Listen to their perspective
4. Collaborate on solutions
5. Agree on next steps

No fluff, no filler—just clarity.

Handle Defensiveness with Grace

Defensiveness is natural. People don’t like feeling attacked. If you sense walls going up, don’t push harder—shift gears.

How to de-escalate:

• Acknowledge emotions: “I can see this feels frustrating.”
• Restate your goal: “I’m bringing this up because I want to see you succeed.”
• Ask what they need: “What would make this conversation easier for you?”
• Suggest a pause if needed: “Would it help if we came back to this later today?”

Your calm presence helps them feel safe enough to re-engage.

Different Types of Feedback

Not all feedback is created equal. Learn to match the type to the situation:

Coaching Feedback → Builds skills and capabilities

• Focus on opportunities, not mistakes
• Ask reflective questions
• Share resources and guidance

Evaluative Feedback → Compares performance against standards

• Be clear about expectations
• Use specific examples, not generalizations
• Connect it back to business outcomes

Appreciation → Recognizes value and contributions

• Be precise about what they did well
• Explain the positive impact
• Share it publicly when appropriate

A healthy feedback culture uses all three—not just pointing out what’s wrong.

Creating a Feedback Culture

Feedback shouldn’t be a rare event or a moment people dread. It should be part of the team’s daily rhythm.

Ways to normalize feedback:

• Make regular check-ins beyond formal reviews
• Ask your team for feedback on your own management
• Celebrate when teammates give feedback to each other
• Include feedback skills in career development

The more often it happens, the less scary it feels.

Common Feedback Mistakes to Avoid

1. Being vague: “You need to communicate better.”
2. Making it personal: “You’re disorganized.”
3. Overloading at once: Too many issues in a single talk.
4. Skipping follow-up: Never revisiting the feedback.
5. Only focusing on problems: Forgetting to highlight strengths.

Avoid these, and you’ll already be ahead of most managers.

The Follow-Up is Critical

Without follow-up, feedback is just venting. The real value comes from circling back and checking progress.

Follow-up checklist:

• Set a date to revisit the topic
• Ask what support they need now
• Point out improvements you’ve seen
• Adjust your approach if things aren’t landing

The Bottom Line

Feedback isn’t about catching mistakes—it’s about unlocking growth. When you approach it with care, clarity, and collaboration, feedback becomes a gift people actually want to receive.

Action step: Identify one person on your team who would benefit from feedback this week. Write out your SBI framework in advance, then schedule a time to have the conversation.

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Sprutia helps managers deliver feedback that sticks by giving you structure, reminders, and progress tracking. When feedback becomes consistent and actionable, it stops being scary and starts being transformative.